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Behold the Kickmen similar games & best alternatives

Behold the Kickmen

PC (Microsoft Windows), Nintendo Switch, Mac • 2017

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Quick resume

BEHOLD THE KICKMEN is a football game made by someone who has no understanding of, or interest in, what is affectionately known as "The Wonderful Game". Start at the bottom of the Big Boring Football Spreadsheet and grind your way up to become the best at the football anyone's ever seen.

Global score

78/100

Genres

Action, Casual, Indie, Sport, Arcade

Similar games

    Pros

    • Humorous and unique take on football
    • Engaging story mode with witty dialogue
    • Accessible yet skillful gameplay
    • Good progression and upgrade systems
    • Excellent value for price

    Cons

    • Single-player only, no multiplayer
    • Some control and ui quirks
    • Limited long-term replayability
    • Ai can be inconsistent
    • Lack of customization options

    Analysis

    Less representative of its motivational profile, with noticeable differences. Motivations that often define this kind of title include Leadership, Survival, Violence, Strategy. Here, the score leans higher than usual among comparable games on Competition. It leans lower than usual among comparable games on Exploration, Violence.

    How to use the graph
    Similar games map

    Each dot is a game. They are arranged from the same motivation profile as in the “Motivations” section below. Closer dots usually mean more similar reasons to play (exploration, competition, relaxation, etc.)—not that one game is “better” than another.

    • Larger dot with a light outline: the game you are viewing.
    • Colour: groups of games with comparable motivation patterns (statistical clusters).
    • Hover a dot to see the game name; click to open its page.
    • Scroll or double-click the chart to zoom out and see more games.

    Why don’t the axes read like a score? This view uses t-SNE: it only keeps who is close to whom. The scales are not “good to bad” or hours played—they separate groups on the map. Read distance between dots, not the axis numbers.

    Motivations

    • Autonomy
      3

      "Players have control over upgrading their team, choosing skills, and directing gameplay actions, though within a structured football-like framework."

    • Competence
      4

      "The game features a learning curve with skill-based tackling, passing, and shooting mechanics, rewarding player improvement and mastery."

    • Competition
      3

      "Players compete against AI teams in leagues and tournaments, with progression and challenges against increasingly difficult opponents."

    • Continuation
      2

      "Story mode and career progression encourage continued play, though some reviews mention limited long-term engagement."

    • Cooperation
      -4

      "The game is single-player only, focusing on individual control of the team without multiplayer or cooperative play."

    • Creativity
      2

      "Players can customize team upgrades and develop strategies, but within predefined game mechanics and no direct creation tools."

    • Domination
      -3

      "Interactions are balanced against AI opponents without social dominance or trash talk; gameplay is competitive but respectful."

    • Escapism
      4

      "The humorous and absurd take on football offers a fun distraction and stress relief from real-life concerns."

    • Expectation
      -4

      "Players engage voluntarily for fun and humor, not out of obligation or external pressure."

    • Experimenting
      3

      "Players explore different skills, tactics, and upgrade paths, experimenting with gameplay mechanics to improve."

    • Exploration
      -3

      "Gameplay is focused on matches in fixed arenas with no exploration of new environments or secrets."

    • Expression
      -2

      "Limited customization mainly through team upgrades; no avatar or environment personalization reported."

    • Fantasy
      4

      "The game features a fictional, absurd version of football with exaggerated rules and humorous narrative."

    • Fellowship
      -4

      "Single-player focus with minimal social or community interaction described."

    • Growth
      4

      "Players develop skills, unlock abilities, and improve their team through progression systems."

    • Health
      -4

      "Typical sedentary video game play with no physical activity or health-related features."

    • Idle
      -3

      "Requires active player attention and control during matches; not designed for idle or background play."

    • Intimacy
      -4

      "No evidence of close social relationships or emotional sharing; primarily solo play experience."

    • Leadership
      2

      "Players manage team upgrades and strategy, guiding their team through progression and matches."

    • Progression
      4

      "Strong emphasis on earning money, upgrading players, and advancing through leagues and story mode."

    • Relaxation
      2

      "Generally fun and humorous gameplay with some challenge; not highly tense but engaging."

    • Sensation
      3

      "Enjoyable audiovisual presentation with upbeat soundtrack and humorous commentary enhancing sensory experience."

    • Status
      -3

      "No social status or recognition systems; achievements and progress are personal and offline."

    • Story
      4

      "Includes a story mode with humorous dialogue and narrative elements that engage players."

    • Strategy
      3

      "Players plan upgrades, manage resources, and use tactics in matches requiring skill and timing."

    • Thrill
      2

      "Some moments of challenge and excitement, though overall gameplay is lighthearted and not highly suspenseful."

    • Value
      4

      "Highly praised for its low price and entertainment value; considered a good return on investment."

    • Violence
      -3

      "Gameplay focuses on ball kicking and scoring rather than combat or destruction."

    • Survival
      1

      "Players must avoid losing matches and manage team stamina and skills, but no high-risk survival elements."

    Where to buy

    Come talk about it on Discord!

    Last update: 29/04/2026